God, i dont know what it is, but I have been all filled with anxiety lately. And as a result it is causing me to be a total fucking asshole where upon I am getting into fights with people and holding grudges where I would normally just let things go. I dont know what the fuck it is, but I do know that I am extremly over-sensitive as of late. I also feel like my skin is going to crawl off of my body and that I am all hot like. Maybe I am having a stroke. I also am finding that I feel an incredible amount of tension around this one group of people that I hang out with here.

Maybe part of it is the fact that we never do anything except go out to eat with these people. Then we all go back to their house and watch fucking animal planet or Home and Garden TV and the husband plays the comp. We do nothing. And as all of you from home know, I love to watch the tele and curl up in pj's. But I also love to go out and go do things, and go to places. I honestly hope that they start another forceshaping program cause I need to get out of here. I need to find some peace and I am not accomplishing it here. And the anxiety is getting worse. I need to take a lil vacation from these people, except my friend Mike, cause I trust my instincts and I know that their is an unspoken tension that has been growing. It all blew up at XMas when I got into an argument with one of their friends over a chess game. Not good. And things will get worse once I have to go live at my dorm room again. So expect to see a flurry of bitching posts in the next few weeks.

Here is one of my outlets for letting off steam. But I really need to like chat with someone from home cause this tension is killing me and I just need some people to vent too. And I cant always just be calling my house cause they dont have that unique persepctive cause they are my family. I guess that is my rant for the day. I chat later.