I believe I am making a deeper and deeper descent into madness like everyday. I have no interest in my keyboard anymore, I hate my job and just feel my chest pounding like a jachammer everytime I go in. I have millions of thoughts running through my head at once with no continuity and what not. I just get nastier and nastier with people, especially those that I dont like, they are whom I am ultra short with. I feel like I am spiraling out of control and there is no control stick.

I feel like I have been duped and that I am not getting the help that I want. I dont believe in the ideals I once held in such high esteem (serve your country, trust in the leadership, etc). In fact I feel that the whole system is nothing but a bunch of lying sacks of crap that have no clue how to run things, and matters will get a whole lot worse with no sign in sight of them getting better. I have become cynical beyond all hell, and I dont know if I am that upset with that. This is my rant. Fin.